FEB 141473@#%!
MEMO FROM THE DUBIOUS AFFAIRS DESK:
Dear Don, Chip, Chiperino, Chipmeister ah shit your just a damn fucking mutant!;
I wish it would fucking stop raining here in the land of the tanned lotus. I am so fucking waterlogged, that my "Austin" is only twenty fucking proof! As I sit here, at my desk and listen to the sounds of U@ on the olympics, I just want to fucking hurl! Is nothing fucking sacred in this god forsaken country! I mean, what sort of strange and perverted country do we live in, when a presential candidate is crucified by the press for actually getting fucking laid!! Hell, its about fucking time that we had a "fucking" swordsman in the white house, porking the first muff.
I'M RAMBLING NOW, DEADLINE PACE:
And now they're fucking coming after me! What the hell did I do? That little bitch said that she was at least fourteen! She was built like she was seventeen! No matter what they say, they can never prove it! All I said to her was that I liked her round and firmewfqweyr-34e515576236 FUCKING GOD DAMN BATS! I'll show those little winged rat fuckers whose boss! WHERE IS MY FUCKING GUN!?
As I think about the olympics, I want to know why the female skaters don't wear G-strings. Just think of the artistic impression scores, of the Russion judge, as his throbbing love pipe swells against his thigh, at the sight of that firm round young ass! Oh shit, I forgot they're now the Unified judges! FUCK THAT THEY'RE STILL FUCKING GODLESS, HEATHEN, REAGEN FEARING COMMUNISTS! WE SHOULD NUKE THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF THEM! WHAT ELSE ARE WE GOING TO DO WITH ALL THOSE FUCKING MISSILES? But I digress.
I still think that we should treat the Unified people, like Tyson treats his dates, rough and hard! 34093jfjes;xlfdvg FUCKING BATS! I'll show them!! I'll feed them my blood in a bowl, as they stagger about, I'll crush the fucking life out of those little rat like weasel fucks! WHERE'S MY ETHER!!!!
(EDITORS NOTE)
At this point, the dictation stops. After a few minutes of silence, the sounds of animal grunts and snorts are heard in the background. Then another solid thud. There is a great amount of silence.
But I digress.
Life is strange, the color balance is gone we, shift to one side. Long live Gonzo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TO BE CONTIUED??????????????????????????????????