I am saved!!!!! Compadre you have done it again!!!!

EDITORS NOTE (95):
The previous fragment was found in Las Vegas the holy Mecca of our Author.

EDITORS NOTE (96):

The following was found in a Buchanan for president flyer. This too had a very strong ammonia smell to it. We had the tape heavily disinfected before it was transcribed.

As the primaries come to a close, I worry about this strange and twisted country of ours. My Compadre and I will live to fight the minions of evil again, but first we must stop a force that is even more evil. The Evil one is no longer a one armed paper hanger from Kansas. He is a heathen of the media! I was there, when he had his fucking sheet fitted, the little pug-nosed muther fucker! He seemed like the every man that I'd searched for in Wako, L.A. and in the rest of my travels. Jesus did I get a fucking wrong number!!!! There is not enough fucking Holy Water in the entire damn world to cleanse this fuckers dark and evil soul. May Elvis have mercy on us all, if this Misogynistic, racist homophobic, Nazi muther fucker is elected!!!!!! I hope that Dole has enough fucking balls to stop this dick! Because Lamar aint fucking got 'em, all he did was set back flannel as a fashion statement back about thirty fucking years! Lord, this country is going to be in a serious case of the fuckin' hebe gebeees if Dole can't stop this fucker!!!!!!!!
(Winter 96)

EDITORS NOTE:

There was a great gap between the Authors memos. We are not sure what caused this long delay. The office has given odds, that the Author was either joining the Viper Militia, or that he was the Chupacabre, sucking the blood of goats down in Mexico. Both of these have yet to be confirmed. The following tape was found bound up in a map of Disneyland. The Map was torn and tattered, with the words BEWARE OF THE PIZZA written in the borders of the maps. We have no idea what it means. Here now, is what we could decipher from the tape..

I've still got the gebbes, or is just a case of the Fucking DT's? Fuck if I know. My Compadre has wandered off into the arms of an angelic Temptress, so for now, I must voyage alone in my fight against the foul demons that have descended upon us. Lord the Republicans are in deep shit! They've got the one armed paper hanger for a candidate, as they look for the ghost of Reagan to rise from his withered arm. Ha silly fools. They are doomed! The last disiple of that Original Dark Lord Nixon is giving the old republican guard its last gasp. Long may it wither in agony.

But yet, there is that fucking nagging suspicion that the Democrats will fuck it up some how. I can see it now. Clinton makes his acceptance speech at the convention, while he fucks a hooker at the podium and Hillary licks Gores balls. God they do have a habit of fucking it all up. Does any one remember Dukais in the fucking tank, God that picture roared with the caption "I AM A FUCKING INCOMPETENT GEEK!" Or Mondale actually telling the truth about the deficit. Hell Fucking Reagan knew what to say, I've got a secret. Jesus that phrase alone, gave the fucking electorate za hard on, that took fucking four years to get over. No, I must save the Democrats from themselves! They will fuck it up with out my help. Compadre! We must ride !!!!!!

EDITORS NOTE:

There is a great deal of silence as the Author waits for his Compadre .

Where the hell is my Compadre, just in the time of our nations darkest hours he disappears! I need Austin, I need strength, from Austin there is strength.

EDITORS NOTE:

The cork is popped, the bottle is drained, the Author goes thud! The tape starts when the Author comes to.

Ah it is all clear to me now, I am not deserted by my Compadre, he will come when the time is right. He is on his own mission now. To save the Democrats now I need the Motley Crew! I must find the Mutant, the Mountain man, and Bubbles! They can help me! It is all so clear to me now. The heart of the darkness that can stop the Democrats rest in the Capitol of the dark lords empire! We must ride to the center of the Dark Lord's empire! There we can stop the Republicans and their evil forces. In the heart of the Republican strong hold known as the orange Empire. The heart of Wilson land, we will find it! To the center of the evil empire we must ride! Come on Crew lets ride! Everyone drinks!

EDITOR'S NOTE:

There is the sound of the Author drinking; but no one else. We think the Author has become delusional since his Compadre is not there. This is only a theory.

We are here. My Motley crew and I have began the Assault on the Dark Empire . Our attack calls for the seizing of the temple and then a move to the future to see if we have accomplished our mission. There we saw no truth. So, we broke for the lunch. The Mutant ordered a mushroom Pizza, with extra shrooooooooms. It was there that the dark empire got us!!! Little did we know. Those FUCKING SCREW HEADS! I'LL KILL THE FUCKERS!

We searched the lands of America after lunch, still no sign of the Dark Lord, or how he was going to help the Dole. But it was here ! I know it. We cruised the seven seas, as the forces of the Evil one began to come under the spell of the Dark One's forces. It was the sight of the Sea Monster that I knew that we were under an evil spell. Once again we went to search the future for clues of the Dark Ones Manipulation of the Dole and the Election.

IT was there that the minions of evil tried to grab us!!!!! Ha we fooled them!!!! We got on another flight, after a brief stop into the room of the blue lights! It was there that I saw it OH MY GOD WE MUST STOP THEM AND THEIR EVIL!!!!!!!!!!!.................

The tape runs out.

EDITORS NOTE:

The Tape stops. We don't know what the Author saw, or if it was even real. With this Author, we can never be sure. We did have one cryptic message. It was written on the tape, it said "A bad trip at the happiest place on earth. Atlanta we may find the truth in Atlanta!" We have told the travel office not to approve any flights to Atlanta for the Author or his group of malcontents.
There is now way to locate him before the Olympics. So to the People of Atlanta, be afraid be very afraid.